Thursday, July 14, 2011

Four score (months) and seven weeks(ish) ago...

I started this blog.  And I have been going in fits and starts since.   My tally is 11 pounds lost, 2 gained back, and holding steady.   I exercise, now.  I LOVE karate.  I even started (and stalled on, but have gotten back to) a couch to 5K.   My fits and starts are closer and closer together, which to me signals that I am nearing a real changeover where the relapses will be even fewer and farther between.  The carbs, they have a hold on me (stupid sugars acting as opiates!). 

A paleo, really low carb lifestyle is just not in the cards for me - nor really, do I think I want it to be...however, a mainstream "moderate carb"/Dr. Oz thing is not my bag, either.  I am a moderation type girl, but I can feel the moderation being way lower than a standard american diet "moderation" - i.e., the SAD guidelines hover around 250-300 grams of carbs a day.  When I was really really working at it I was keeping carbs below 80 grams a day, but that has not proven to be sustainable at this point in my life.  I do, however, think I could keep under 100 pretty easily and long term, which is something to feel good about.    When I look at my diet a year ago compared to today, it's an unbelievable difference.   The things I've learned I can easily live without are amazing.  The things I've found as sticking points are, well, sticking points.  And I need to get to a place where they are no longer sticky. 

Life is going to be crazy for me in the next 12 months (husband starting a 1-year intense academic program plus working on weekends and any schoolnight he can squeeze it in, so I'll be holding down the fort solo for the next year), and I will be trying my level best to attack the sticking points, but allowing myself grace when I falter.  There is a related diet/lifestyle thing going on with the kids, which I will put in another post in the coming days, as it has taught me a lot as well about them, and myself.

The next year's plan is:
-  Whole foods as much as possible
-  Good sources of protein and whole fats
-  Really limit white flour and sugar and use whole wheat products sparingly (not a problem, since I'm not particularly fond of a lot of whole wheat products anyway) - this is actually not difficult for me when I actually DO it.  I just slip back into old habits without even thinking about it
-  Make potatoes and rice COUNT when I eat them, in small portions and savor them instead of shoveling
-  Stop drinking FLIPPING SODA.  It's insanity.  The worst part is I actually LIKE plain seltzer, so I have no idea why I keep reaching for soda (when I'm out - we haven't had it in the house for months now)

And keep on exercising.  I am really, REALLY not a fan of warm weather, so this really challenges me for the summer months.  I have to keep up the running because I am signed up for a race with friends in August and I don't want to be beetlebomb finishing 2 hours after them.  But I think in the future, I am not going to be running in the summer and will stick with inside, cooler activities - and not sign up for races in the dead of summer (derp).  Though karate is a sweatfest too since they do not have air conditioning in the dojo, just fans.

 It would seem like I totally have the discipline to do this, it's just dopey hardwired habits that happen when I'm not ultra focused.  I have a LOT to think about and keep track of every day in my life, and unfortunately this gets pushed to the back after kids, husband, family, friends, work, house......but - I'm confident it will come more easily as I keep on keepin' on.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Miserable weather...

...makes me want carbs.  9 pounds down though, so I'm using that as motivation.  Still not drinking enough water.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Stomach ick again?

Bother.  But, I weathered it and am back to my usual, and am a total of 8 pounds down now.  Onward!

Monday, February 21, 2011

Oh, how the mighty have fallen....

...or something like that.  I sure ain't mighty.  Last week was HORRIBLE.  Virtually back to every old bad habit I had.  And the problem?  I was bored, tired, stressed, and didn't plan out what to eat.  So, I reached for all my old friends.  Grrrrrr.

Soooo, this week, I wrote out exactly what I'm going to eat all week.  Every meal, every snack, planned and typed and printed out so I can tick them off as I do them.  I may post a daily cal/carb/nutrient analysis.

I had lost 6 pounds, and gained 2 back.  Bother.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Moar wtr plz.

Last week was a week of replacements, this week will be the week of water.  Because I'm just not getting enough of it.  I plunk down to do some work in the morning and then next thing I know it's 2 hours later and I haven't had any water...then it's time for school pickup and errands and housework and running around and second kid pickup and after school activities...and hey, it's dinnertime and I *still* haven't had any water.  Then baths and bed and more work and oopsies, it's 11:30pm, time for bed!  Can't drink any now because I don't want to be up at night to pee, I need every minute of sleep I can get.  I'm lucky if I'm getting 24 oz a day, max.

SO:  Giant water cup, get ready to get some use again, friend.  I'm going to set a popup alarm in the morning to remind me to do it until it blends in with the regular routine.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Lemme tell you what's a bad idea...

Letting yourself have a slice of pizza and a 1/4 glass of soda because it's the Superbowl, and you have a ton of wiggle room left for the day's goals.

Bad idea.

Bad, bad idea.

Monday sucked, coming back down off the sugary starchiness. 

Today was much better.

Now I know why "they" tell you to stay on this induction level for 2 weeks.  Ack!

Saturday, February 5, 2011

The week of replacements.

This past week was about powering through with whatever i had laying around the house.

This coming week is about picking up new habits and replacements for some of the things I think are going to give me trouble.

Tonight:  Had spaghetti squash instead of spaghetti.  It was....tolerable.  It was a side dish, that tasted good with some butter, parmesan, and sauce...and actually pretty darn good with the chicken/sauce/cheese.  So I'll call that a win - but I won't be eating a serving of it as leftovers, and I'll have to figure out a good way of using it up in other ways since I only ate about a quarter of the squash tonight.

On deck this week: 
- Roasted chickpeas as a snack
- Kale chips as a snack
- Mashed cauliflower instead of potatoes, and
- Cauliflower "rice" (I'm *really* intrigued by this one). 

The way I figure it, with the side dishes....if it gets me eating a small to normal sized portion of the replacement as a side because I don't like the taste quite as much, instead of 2-3 portions of the "real thing", so much the better. 

Today:  1422 calories, 67 g carbs, 88 g fats, 108 g protein

I am all set up this week with lots of easy-to-grab-and-go stuff to eat so I don't have to put in a lot of effort creating things to eat.  This week is going to be much more tasty and varied flavor wise than last week was.

Friday, February 4, 2011


Monday, I was suddenly stricken with the thought, "I can totally do this."


I have.

I've been lowering my carbs/sugars for the past 5 days, and I'm feeling good.  Not only good physically, but good emotionally, because it turns out I have an iron clad will.  Now, as to why I didn't do it before, and thought I had no willpower, that's for the armchair analysis of you, gentle reader. 

Every day this past week I've been under 80 g carbs...which I know is way above the induction phase of Atkins, but is still a significant decrease from the SAD's 250-300 g.  I have allowed myself:
- A tsp of sugar in my coffee every morning.  That's as low as I've been able to get it and still drink it.  I know I could give coffee up entirely, but right now I don't want to.  Maybe I will eventually.
- 4 Goldfish, 3 popcorn kernels, and 5 Fritos.  And man did I savor them. 

Otherwise, I've been pretty much carb and fruit-free.  Eating a LOT of vegetables and protein. 

I have NOT:
- Had any more of my son's birthday cake after his birthday this past Saturday.
- Had any of the rice, biscuits, or hand cut homemade french fries that have been made this week for family dinners.
- Had any soda.

One more week of this, and then I'm going to add back in some fruits, but shoot for the lowest carb ones.  I'll add back in some dark chocolate too, I know there's no way I'll be able to go without chocolate so I'll have to build that into my day.  I'll actually shop to prepare for this coming week, instead of scrambling with what I happened to have on hand.  So more snacky things, and lunch-y things that are quick and easy for me to grab. 

Long term, my plan is to stay completely away from:
- Bread (maybe one slice of whole wheat toast for breakfast a couple times a week) and pasta
- Added sugar
- Fast food (it's embarrassing how much we had been eating in the past year)
- Soda (except very, very rarely - like special occasions)
- Baked goods (again, just on special occasions) - I'll still make them for the kids fairly regularly, I just won't have them.  Or maybe one bite.  I seem to be able to do "one bite", but not a "small serving".

And have just a few bites of the following a week:
- potatoes
-  rice

"small servings" and "moderation" apparently just don't work for me.  I can't take a half a serving of pasta, or potatoes, or rice, because then....I want more.  One bite, I can do.  I've tried moderation over and over again, for the past 10 years....with bread, pasta, and sugar, I just don't think it's an option for me, at least not for a long while. 
My days have looked like:
Breakfast:  Coffee, 2 hard boiled eggs, bacon, some salad veggies.
Snack: a slice of lunchmeat
Lunch:  a slice of lunchmeat, a cup of 2% cottage cheese with 5-6 grape tomatoes  OR  tuna salad with cuke slices
Snack: green beans, pepperoni slices, some cheese, broccoli
Dinner:  Whatever protein the family is having, and a gigantic salad with lettuce, spinach, and vegetables.
Snack:  A spoonful of peanut butter

With a crapton of water throughout the day.  I'm making a point of drinking a glass of water when I get hungry to see if I'm really hungry, or just thirsty.

I'm coming in between 1400-1800 cal a day, and 80 g of carbs.  And I'm satisfied and full, and don't feel the need to eat more.  And it feels good.  Adding an apple here or there, some berries, a clementine a couple times a week, and adding in some bite-sized dark chocolate and I will be a pretty happy camper.  I'm going to shoot for between 100-125 g carbs for the short-longish term and see how my body responds to it.

And so once again, onward and upward.  Now that I've seen myself doing it, I'm not dreading it anymore, and it's really not that bad in the practice so far.  Now who knows, I may crash spectacularly...but I'm thinking not.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Sputtering along

Stumbling, falling, alternately succeeding.  It's a little demoralizing that I don't have the willpower to just do it.  The sugar/carb addiction is so powerful, and I feel so weak against it.  I am in a biorhythm low right now so feeling scattered about a lot of things in life.  I feel a big purge coming on, for a lot of aspects of my life.  Hopefully one of them will be the SAD.